SKIER ROBERT VIETZE PEED ON LITTLE GIRL

P***ER

HE REALLY was taking the piste. 

Top skier Robert Vietze got drunk on a Jet Blue flight from Portland to Oregon when he allegedly urinated on an 11-year-old girl. 

The arrogant 18-year-old, who is among the 75 best in the country and had been penciled into for next year's Winter Olympics, apparently got up shortly after take off. 

But instead of hitting the bathroom, he stumbled five rows up and emptied his bladder on the 11-year-girl's leg. 

The girl's father, a Stage 4 cancer patient, caught Vietze midstream and tried to wipe him out.

One witness told the NY Post: "I woke up to this man yelling and literally looking like he was about to punch this kid in the face."

"The father was screaming, "F - - k that kid! I don't want him near my family!"' as flight attendants attempted to separate the pair."

Rather than apologize for his disgraceful actions however, the leaky loser from South Warren, VA reportedly told authorities: "I was drunk, and I did not realise I was p*****g on her leg."

He was issued a federal summons for indecent exposure and released, the Post reported but the father refused to allow his traumatized 11-year-old daughter to be interviewed by cops, likely sparing Vietze criminal charges. 

His actions may have cost him his Olympic dream however as his name was bumped from the team's developmental roster yesterday afternoon, although officials refused to comment about his status.

JetBlue they said only that an 'incident was reported on Flight 166' and would not say whether the little girl and her family would receive compensation or a free flight for their troubles.

SEXIEST DUI EVER: MODEL SUELYN MEDEIROS, BUST-ED

BUST-ED

WHAT a bust - and the arrest wasn't bad either.
There would definitely been a few raised eyebrows as Brazilian bikini model SueLyn Medeiros was marched into the station house.
Cops told gossip site TMZ that the 25-year-old beauty was pulled over in Hollywood on Wednesday after crashing her DeLorean into a parked car.
Opening the Back to the Future mobile, cops said there was a strong odor of booze in the car and their suspicions were confirmed when her blood alcohol level was .14 almost twice the legal limit in California.   As they gave her the field sobriety test and bragged that
she was rich model and giggled in their faces. 
She also reportedly flirted with the officers. As of Thursday, TMZ reports that Medeiros is still in custody with bail set at $45,000.

AMY LOCANE-BOVENIZER LAUGHED AFTER DEADLY CRASH

DRUNK

MELROSE Place star Amy Locane-Bovenizer was giggling and laughing after a car crash that killed a a woman, a cop testified yesterday.
Then the troubled soap star told officer William Wilkes that emergency medical personnel were being "overly dramatic" and asked why "they were making such a big deal."  
 He testified yesterday: “I said, ‘The reason I’m making such a big deal is because you were just in a severe two-car collision."
Locane-Bovenizer is charged with aggravated manslaughter stemming from the death of 60-year-old Helene Seeman.
Prosecutors allege the 39-year-old actress was drunk and speeding when her vehicle struck one driven by Seeman's husband.
The court hearing will continue Tuesday with cross-examination.

STEPHANIE ROBINETTE SPRAYED BREAST MILK ON COPS

WHAT A BOOB

SHE really made a boob of herself with this one. 
Drunken Stephanie Robinette definitely wasn't on her breast behavior at the wedding, when she got hammered and started smacking her husband. 
After hitting him a few times, she ran off and locking herself in the car. 
Lord knows what the bride and groom must have made of it, but at some point someone called the cops about her rowdy behavior. 
But when deputies arrived, she allegedly screamed profanities at them, before removing her right breast from her dress and spraying them with milk.
Quite what she thought this would do, is beyond us?
She was released Monday after being charged with domestic violence, assault, obstructing official business, resisting arrest and disorderly conduct, authorities said.
Robinette, who pleaded not guilty to the charges, was released from custody on her own recognizance following a video arraignment on Monday, 10TV News reported.
Before her release, Robinette, a teacher employed at a charter school, apologized for what occurred.
She said: "I have no criminal record; I take these charges very seriously and I absolutely intend to seek help for substance abuse with alcohol because alcoholism does run in my family."

LINDSAY LOHAN 'DIDN'T' VIOLATE PROBATION: JUDGE

ALLOWED TO DRINK

SHE has more lives than.... well we're not sure what, because she's beaten a cat hands down.
Because astonishingly, former actress Lindsay Lohan did not violate her probation and she is legally allowed to drink.
The one time movie star did reportedly fail an alcohol test on June 13, according to TMZ the day after she held a rooftop party at her Venice, CA home - where she was serving hard time her sentence for violating her probation.
But it turns out she shouldn't have been tested at all because it turns out that the order requiring Lohan to submit to alcohol tests expired back in February.
So Judge Stephanie Sautner, who presided over the actress's latest court date Thursday, ruled that Lohan did not violate the terms of her probation in a 2007 DUI case.
She told the idiot star, who at least managed to show up on time: "Having parties on the roof of your house ... is extremely poor judgment."
However, she did rule that Lohan may now have only one friend at her home at a time so no more parties.
Lohan's attorney Shawn Holley said: "She has done nothing wrong."

JACKASS RYAN DUNN WAS DRUNK: COPS

DUNN LEFT, HOURS BEFORE DEATH, DRINK IN HAND

JACKASS Ryan Dunn was drunk and speeding up to 140mph when his Porsche careered of a highway and blew up in a huge ball of flames, cops have confirmed.
Toxicology reports showed the ginger bearded star's  blood alcohol level was more than twice the Pennsylvania limit of 0.08 at 0.196.
But while the manager of Barnaby's in West Chester confirmed that a tweeted photo showing Dunn with a drink his in hand was taken at the bar, he claimed that he didn't seem drunk when he left.
He added: "Ryan was not a hardcore drinker, at least not when he was here."
Dunn's car was found almost just a mile away from the bar by cops who described it as "fully engulfed in flames," when they arrived.
They confirmed Dunn, best known for shoving a toy car up his ass was driving the car in the accident which also killed  Zachary Hartwell, 30.
West Goshen Police Chief Michael Carroll said in a statement: "The initial crash reconstruction investigation determined that Mr. Dunn's vehicle was traveling between 132-140 mph at the time of the collision."
A funeral date has yet to be announced.

JACKASS RYAN DUNN MAY HAVE BEEN SPEEDING: COPS

JACKASS star Ryan Dunn wasn't killed by one of show's incredible stunts, instead he may have been speeding, cops say. Probably best known for inserting a toy car into his ass for a gag called "Butt X-Ray" in the first of the franchises two movies, Dunn's Porsche left the road outsider of Philadelphia and burst into flames.
His passenger Zachary Hartwell was also killed in the 3am crash, which happened shortly after Dunn  had tweeted a picture of himself drinking with friends.
The photo has since been removed, but has been retweeted by many of his fans. Autopsies were to be conducted yesterday but it's unclear when the results will be released.

Along with the "Jackass" movies and a film that hasn't been released yet called "Living Will," the 34-year-old was the star of his own MTV show, "Homewrecker," and had just began hosting the show "Proving Ground" on the G4 cable network.
TV execs are still debating whether they will be shown.
NOT A GREAT DRIVING RECORD

DUI GUY TRIES DIALLING WITH CIGARETTE PACK

HE really didn't help his case with this.

Because after he was pulled over for drunk driving, this Russian guy then attempted to make a phone call with a packet of cigarettes. It was clearly very important, although obviously a bit boring because then he seems to fall asleep on the officer's shoulder. Needless to say their keen eyes spotted his mistake and picked him up.

BIG EASY BOOZE-A-RAMMA: NO CHARGES FOR NIC CAGE

DRUNK

HOLLYWOOD legend Nicolas Cage won't face criminal charges for the drunken argument with his wife in New Orleans last month.
The academy award winning actor was busted in the big easy's French Quarter after allegedly grabbing his wife's arm and pounding on cars during the boozy fight about whether a nearby house was the one they were renting.
He was filming "Medallion" at the time but that night he was booked on domestic abuse, disturbing the peace and public drunkenness.  
But Cage's attorney Harry Rosenberg said that the district attorney's office refused the charges and no prosecution would occur.
"The conduct did not amount to criminal conduct," said a district attorney's office spokesman.
Cage had been set free on $11,000 bond put up by bail bondsman Duane Chapman, aka "Dog the Bounty Hunter."

KNOB THE BUILDER: MAN STEALS DIGGER FOR JOYRIDE

DRUNK?? REALLY?

ARTISTS IMPRESSION

IF your going to go for a joyride stealing a huge digger probably isn't the best idea if you want to get away from the cops.
But it's unclear whether Adam Bergenty was really thinking about escaping or what really was on the drunken 22-year-old's mind. After stealing the backhoe he knocked down three mail boxes, two street lights and an above ground utility box, cops said.
Needless to say he failed a field sobriety test and refused to take a breathalyzer, so he's been charged with driving
under the influence.
But that's the least of his worries as he's also been slapped with first-degree criminal mischief, evading responsibility, interfering with an officer, reckless driving and using a motor vehicle without permission.
Bergenty stole the vehicle using a master key that he had kept from a previous job, police said.